Lesson #6 – Nothing in Hockey is Free but it’s the cost that teaches you the most

December 3, 2018

Lesson #6 – Nothing in Hockey is Free but it’s the cost that teaches you the most

One of my greatest challenges as a mom is watching my children go through any kind of struggle. My first reaction is to want to jump in and fix it for them. I’m sure if you ask any parent most would say they feel the same. After my son was done playing minor hockey I realized just how much the struggles in hockey had taught him. I realized that everything he’s learned would be incredible life lessons that would carry him into adulthood.

There were many moments that I got caught up in the dream, the hope of him making it to the next level, “the rewards” of being an elite player. Reflecting back, I realized that what I thought was “the reward” was all wrong. What I learned was that the reward from playing hockey was the young man that came out of all those experiences; this young, articulate man who could now go into any job interview and hold his head up with confidence and know how to conduct himself. The reward was that if he didn’t get the job, he’d be able to look the employer in the face, shake their hand and thank them for the experience. We didn’t teach him that, hockey did. Throughout every tryout and being cut, through every great save and bad goal, he learned how to succeed and how to live with disappointment gracefully. You don’t learn that by not facing adversity as you grow up.


The lesson six (6) from Lessons from Behind the Glass it reads:


“There is a lot to be said for repeatedly being knocked down and having to get yourself back up. I knew that in my son’s life there would be times that he wouldn’t get jobs he applied for, he’d have his heart broken at some point and he’d face more cuts if he was going to continue moving forward with hockey. Because of all he faced in hockey I could see that he was learning to handle disappointments with resilience. He was growing up and when given opportunities I knew he’d make the most of them. You can’t teach that kind of life lesson. It was brutal to watch, but I can say now that I look back I’m thankful for all he went through.”


I don’t know if I can say I’ll ever get used to watching my children struggle through anything. What I do know is that they have their whole lives ahead of them so let’s help prepare them for adulthood. I hate to tell you this, but you won’t be able to go into their university or college to fight for a better mark if they fail a test. You can’t go into their place of employment and get them a raise either, so don’t be the parent that goes after the coach if they don’t pick your child for a team. It doesn’t help your young player if you are more disappointed than they are. Teach them how to be resilient now; allowing them to face adversity will offer them a gift of strength that will help them grow into strong adults. As the lesson says, “Nothing in hockey is free, but it’s the cost that teaches you the most!”


Click here for video – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fCb9jR6yeo


Written by Allyson Tufts